Mon 16 Aug 2004
Today is a busy day for me as I have company from out of town (and have been up since 5am trying to find someone on the east coast to fix my house!) so I thought I’d post another adoption journal update. I’m posting this historically from my adoption journal in an effort to motivate me to get on the stick and stop being so intimidated starting my kids Lifebooks.
This is day three…. and if you wish to start at the beginning, check the July Archives for posts that start with an ” * “
Morning visit of day 3 - March 3rd
Music room was locked so we couldn’t get to Noah. The music room divides the baby house and there was no other way around. So we spent the morning with Dinara. It was a rough morning. Three steps forward yesterday, then two steps back today. It wasn’t as bad as the first day, but she did cry a lot. We can tell that she doesn’t have (RAD) Reactive Attachment Disorder, because she’s really attached to her caregivers and loves to be held and cuddled. But she is soooooo stubborn. Pushes toys away, pouts, cries. Today, when she cried, John didn’t let go of her. This made her even madder. John and I would just like to let her cry a bit…but the caregivers always “rush to her side”. To me, she has learned that if she cries, she gets to go with the caregivers. Of course I understand they want to comfort this child…but I want a chance to learn to comfort my child too. It’s stressful. We are under the watchful eye and it feels like we aren’t good enough because Dinara just isn’t feeling any love today.
It’s really hard on me. John is being a real trooper. I knew going into this that toddler adoption wasn’t a cakewalk, but it’s not what I expected.
No worries though… we are going to make this work. I just am having a tough time. This afternoon I am hoping to see my happy man Noah. I could use a “pick me up” after our two hours with Dinara.
I’ll write more later….
Related posts:
- *Day Nine - Morning Passport Pics This is the continuation of my travel...
- *Day Seven - Lucky Seven This is the continuation of my travel...
- *Seattle Earthquake - March 1st morning This is the continuation of my adoption...
