Im not racing. At all.

Last night, my foot became very bruised and is now a different color then my other foot. The pain brought tears to my eyes many times. I couldn’t stand on it let alone walk on it last night. I am now on crutches.

I am very depressed today. Hubby is now trying to find a wheelchair we can rent so I can attend the race. There is no way I could stand around.

I am going to the race to cheer on my friends but its taking every ounce of energy I can muster to do so. When Im in pain (emotional and physical) I just want to be alone… to wallow in my own self pity. I dont want to be a spectator. I dont feel cheery. I feel a sense of loss because I want to be a participant! It’s going to be torture to watch. But I need to access the vein of good sportsmanship i know runs through me and be there for people i care about. Dear God, please dont let me be a blubbering idiot.

On the bright side…..

Oh wait. There is no bright side.

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